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CHAPTER XXIII
A ROYAL INVITATION
Although I had, for the most part, so very stout an
appetite, that none but mother saw any need of
encouraging me to eat, I could only manage one true
good meal in a day, at the time I speak of. Mother
was in despair at this, and tempted me with the whole
of the rack, and even talked of sending to Porlock for
a druggist who came there twice in a week; and Annie
spent all her time in cooking, and even Lizzie sang
songs to me; for she could sing very sweetly. But my
conscience told me that Betty Muxworthy had some reason
upon her side.
'Latt the young ozebird aloun, zay I. Makk zuch ado
about un, wi' hogs'-puddens, and hock-bits, and
lambs'-mate, and whaten bradd indade, and brewers' ale
avore dinner-time, and her not to zit wi' no winder
aupen--draive me mad 'e doo, the ov'ee, zuch a passel
of voouls. Do 'un good to starve a bit; and takk zome
on's wackedness out ov un.'
But mother did not see it so; and she even sent for
Nicholas Snowe to bring his three daughters with him,
and have ale and cake in the parlour, and advise about
what the bees were doing, and when a swarm might be
looked for. Being vexed about this and having to stop
at home nearly half the evening, I lost good manners so
much as to ask him (even in our own house!) what he
meant by not mending the swing-hurdle where the Lynn
stream flows from our land into his, and which he is
bound to maintain. But he looked at me in a superior
manner, and said, 'Business, young man, in business
time.'
I had other reason for being vexed with Farmer Nicholas
just now, viz. that I had heard a rumour, after church
one Sunday--when most of all we sorrow over the sins of
one another--that Master Nicholas Snowe had been seen
to gaze tenderly at my mother, during a passage of the
sermon, wherein the parson spoke well and warmly about
the duty of Christian love. Now, putting one thing
with another, about the bees, and about some ducks, and
a bullock with a broken knee-cap, I more than suspected
that Farmer Nicholas was casting sheep's eyes at my
mother; not only to save all further trouble in the
matter of the hurdle, but to override me altogether
upon the difficult question of damming. And I knew
quite well that John Fry's wife never came to help at
the washing without declaring that it was a sin for a
well-looking woman like mother, with plenty to live on,
and only three children, to keep all the farmers for
miles around so unsettled in their minds about her.
Mother used to answer 'Oh fie, Mistress Fry! be good
enough to mind your own business.' But we always saw
that she smoothed her apron, and did her hair up
afterwards, and that Mistress Fry went home at night
with a cold pig's foot or a bowl of dripping.
Therefore, on that very night, as I could not well
speak to mother about it, without seeming undutiful,
after lighting the three young ladies--for so in sooth
they called themselves--all the way home with our
stable-lanthorn, I begged good leave of Farmer Nicholas
(who had hung some way behind us) to say a word in
private to him, before he entered his own house.
'Wi' all the plaisure in laife, my zon,' he answered
very graciously, thinking perhaps that I was prepared
to speak concerning Sally.
'Now, Farmer Nicholas Snowe,' I said, scarce knowing
how to begin it, 'you must promise not to be vexed with
me, for what I am going to say to you.'
'Vaxed wi' thee! Noo, noo, my lad. I 'ave a knowed
thee too long for that. And thy veyther were my best
friend, afore thee. Never wronged his neighbours,
never spak an unkind word, never had no maneness in
him. Tuk a vancy to a nice young 'ooman, and never kep
her in doubt about it, though there wadn't mooch to
zettle on her. Spak his maind laike a man, he did, and
right happy he were wi' her. Ah, well a day! Ah, God
knoweth best. I never shall zee his laike again. And
he were the best judge of a dung-heap anywhere in this
county.'
'Well, Master Snowe,' I answered him, 'it is very
handsome of you to say so. And now I am going to be
like my father, I am going to speak my mind.'
'Raight there, lad; raight enough, I reckon. Us has
had enough of pralimbinary.'
'Then what I want to say is this--I won't have any one
courting my mother.'
'Coortin' of thy mother, lad?' cried Farmer Snowe, with
as much amazement as if the thing were impossible;
'why, who ever hath been dooin' of it?'
'Yes, courting of my mother, sir. And you know best
who comes doing it.'
'Wull, wull! What will boys be up to next? Zhud a'
thought herzelf wor the proper judge. No thank 'ee,
lad, no need of thy light. Know the wai to my own
door, at laste; and have a raight to goo there.' And he
shut me out without so much as offering me a drink of
cider.
The next afternoon, when work was over, I had seen to
the horses, for now it was foolish to trust John Fry,
because he had so many children, and his wife had taken
to scolding; and just as I was saying to myself that in
five days more my month would be done, and myself free
to seek Lorna, a man came riding up from the ford where
the road goes through the Lynn stream. As soon as I
saw that it was not Tom Faggus, I went no farther to
meet him, counting that it must be some traveller bound
for Brendon or Cheriton, and likely enough he would
come and beg for a draught of milk or cider; and then
on again, after asking the way.
But instead of that, he stopped at our gate, and stood
up from his saddle, and halloed as if he were somebody;
and all the time he was flourishing a white thing in
the air, like the bands our parson weareth. So I
crossed the court-yard to speak with him.
'Service of the King!' he saith; 'service of our lord
the King! Come hither, thou great yokel, at risk of
fine and imprisonment.'
Although not pleased with this, I went to him, as
became a loyal man; quite at my leisure, however, for
there is no man born who can hurry me, though I hasten
for any woman.
'Plover Barrows farm!' said he; 'God only knows how
tired I be. Is there any where in this cursed county
a cursed place called Plover Barrows farm? For last
twenty mile at least they told me 'twere only half a
mile farther, or only just round corner. Now tell me
that, and I fain would thwack thee if thou wert not
thrice my size.'
'Sir,' I replied, 'you shall not have the trouble.
This is Plover's Barrows farm, and you are kindly
welcome. Sheep's kidneys is for supper, and the ale
got bright from the tapping. But why do you think ill
of us? We like not to be cursed so.'
'Nay, I think no ill,' he said; 'sheep's kidneys is
good, uncommon good, if they do them without burning.
But I be so galled in the saddle ten days, and never a
comely meal of it. And when they hear "King's service"
cried, they give me the worst of everything. All the
way down from London, I had a rogue of a fellow in
front of me, eating the fat of the land before me, and
every one bowing down to him. He could go three miles
to my one though he never changed his horse. He might
have robbed me at any minute, if I had been worth the
trouble. A red mare he rideth, strong in the loins,
and pointed quite small in the head. I shall live to
see him hanged yet.'
All this time he was riding across the straw of our
courtyard, getting his weary legs out of the leathers,
and almost afraid to stand yet. A coarse-grained,
hard-faced man he was, some forty years of age or so,
and of middle height and stature. He was dressed in a
dark brown riding suit, none the better for Exmoor mud,
but fitting him very differently from the fashion of
our tailors. Across the holsters lay his cloak, made
of some red skin, and shining from the sweating of the
horse. As I looked down on his stiff bright
head-piece, small quick eyes and black needly beard, he
seemed to despise me (too much, as I thought) for a
mere ignoramus and country bumpkin.
'Annie, have down the cut ham,' I shouted, for my
sister was come to the door by chance, or because of
the sound of a horse in the road, 'and cut a few
rashers of hung deer's meat. There is a gentleman come
to sup, Annie. And fetch the hops out of the tap with
a skewer that it may run more sparkling.'
'I wish I may go to a place never meant for me,' said
my new friend, now wiping his mouth with the sleeve of
his brown riding coat, 'if ever I fell among such good
folk. You are the right sort, and no error therein.
All this shall go in your favour greatly, when I make
deposition. At least, I mean, if it be as good in the
eating as in the hearing. 'Tis a supper quite fit for
Tom Faggus himself, the man who hath stolen my victuals
so. And that hung deer's meat, now is it of the red
deer running wild in these parts?'
'To be sure it is, sir,' I answered; 'where should we
get any other?'
'Right, right, you are right, my son. I have heard
that the flavour is marvellous. Some of them came and
scared me so, in the fog of the morning, that I
hungered for them ever since. Ha, ha, I saw their
haunches. But the young lady will not forget--art sure
she will not forget it?'
'You may trust her to forget nothing, sir, that may
tempt a guest to his comfort.'
'In faith, then, I will leave my horse in your hands,
and be off for it. Half the pleasure of the mouth is
in the nose beforehand. But stay, almost I forgot my
business, in the hurry which thy tongue hath spread
through my lately despairing belly. Hungry I am, and
sore of body, from my heels right upward, and sorest in
front of my doublet, yet may I not rest nor bite
barley-bread, until I have seen and touched John Ridd.
God grant that he be not far away; I must eat my
saddle, if it be so.'
'Have no fear, good sir,' I answered; 'you have seen
and touched John Ridd. I am he, and not one likely to
go beneath a bushel.'
'It would take a large bushel to hold thee, John Ridd.
In the name of the King, His Majesty, Charles the
Second, these presents!'
He touched me with the white thing which I had first
seen him waving, and which I now beheld to be
sheepskin, such as they call parchment. It was tied
across with cord, and fastened down in every corner
with unsightly dabs of wax. By order of the messenger
(for I was over-frightened now to think of doing
anything), I broke enough of seals to keep an Easter
ghost from rising; and there I saw my name in large;
God grant such another shock may never befall me in my
old age.
'Read, my son; read, thou great fool, if indeed thou
canst read,' said the officer to encourage me; 'there
is nothing to kill thee, boy, and my supper will be
spoiling. Stare not at me so, thou fool; thou art big
enough to eat me; read, read, read.'
'If you please, sir, what is your name?' I asked;
though why I asked him I know not, except from fear of
witchcraft.
'Jeremy Stickles is my name, lad, nothing more than a
poor apparitor of the worshipful Court of King's Bench.
And at this moment a starving one, and no supper for me
unless thou wilt read.'
Being compelled in this way, I read pretty nigh as
follows; not that I give the whole of it, but only the
gist and the emphasis,--
'To our good subject, John Ridd, etc.'--describing me
ever so much better than I knew myself--'by these
presents, greeting. These are to require thee, in the
name of our lord the King, to appear in person before
the Right Worshipful, the Justices of His Majesty's
Bench at Westminster, laying aside all thine own
business, and there to deliver such evidence as is
within thy cognisance, touching certain matters whereby
the peace of our said lord the King, and the well-being
of this realm, is, are, or otherwise may be impeached,
impugned, imperilled, or otherwise detrimented. As
witness these presents.' And then there were four
seals, and then a signature I could not make out, only
that it began with a J, and ended with some other
writing, done almost in a circle. Underneath was added
in a different handwriting 'Charges will be borne. The
matter is full urgent.'
The messenger watched me, while I read so much as I
could read of it; and he seemed well pleased with my
surprise, because he had expected it. Then, not
knowing what else to do, I looked again at the cover,
and on the top of it I saw, 'Ride, Ride, Ride! On His
Gracious Majesty's business; spur and spare not.'
It may be supposed by all who know me, that I was taken
hereupon with such a giddiness in my head and noisiness
in my ears, that I was forced to hold by the crook
driven in below the thatch for holding of the
hay-rakes. There was scarcely any sense left in me,
only that the thing was come by power of Mother
Melldrum, because I despised her warning, and had again
sought Lorna. But the officer was grieved for me, and
the danger to his supper.
'My son, be not afraid,' he said; 'we are not going to
skin thee. Only thou tell all the truth, and it shall
be--but never mind, I will tell thee all about it, and
how to come out harmless, if I find thy victuals good,
and no delay in serving them.'
'We do our best, sir, without bargain,' said I, 'to
please our visitors.'
But when my mother saw that parchment (for we could not
keep it from her) she fell away into her favourite bed
of stock gilly-flowers, which she had been tending;
and when we brought her round again, did nothing but
exclaim against the wickedness of the age and people.
'It was useless to tell her; she knew what it was, and
so should all the parish know. The King had heard what
her son was, how sober, and quiet, and diligent, and
the strongest young man in England; and being himself
such a reprobate--God forgive her for saying so--he
could never rest till he got poor Johnny, and made him
as dissolute as himself. And if he did that'--here
mother went off into a fit of crying; and Annie minded
her face, while Lizzie saw that her gown was in comely
order.
But the character of the King improved, when Master
Jeremy Stickles (being really moved by the look of it,
and no bad man after all) laid it clearly before my
mother that the King on his throne was unhappy, until
he had seen John Ridd. That the fame of John had gone
so far, and his size, and all his virtues--that verily
by the God who made him, the King was overcome with it.
Then mother lay back in her garden chair, and smiled
upon the whole of us, and most of all on Jeremy;
looking only shyly on me, and speaking through some
break of tears. 'His Majesty shall have my John; His
Majesty is very good: but only for a fortnight. I want
no titles for him. Johnny is enough for me; and Master
John for the working men.'
Now though my mother was so willing that I should go to
London, expecting great promotion and high glory for
me, I myself was deeply gone into the pit of sorrow.
For what would Lorna think of me? Here was the long
month just expired, after worlds of waiting; there
would be her lovely self, peeping softly down the glen,
and fearing to encourage me; yet there would be nobody
else, and what an insult to her! Dwelling upon this,
and seeing no chance of escape from it, I could not
find one wink of sleep; though Jeremy Stickles (who
slept close by) snored loud enough to spare me some.
For I felt myself to be, as it were, in a place of some
importance; in a situation of trust, I may say; and
bound not to depart from it. For who could tell what
the King might have to say to me about the Doones--and
I felt that they were at the bottom of this strange
appearance--or what His Majesty might think, if after
receiving a message from him (trusty under so many
seals) I were to violate his faith in me as a
churchwarden's son, and falsely spread his words
abroad?
Perhaps I was not wise in building such a wall of
scruples. Nevertheless, all that was there, and
weighed upon me heavily. And at last I made up my
mind to this, that even Lorna must not know the reason
of my going, neither anything about it; but that she
might know I was gone a long way from home, and perhaps
be sorry for it. Now how was I to let her know even
that much of the matter, without breaking compact?
Puzzling on this, I fell asleep, after the proper time
to get up; nor was I to be seen at breakfast time; and
mother (being quite strange to that) was very uneasy
about it. But Master Stickles assured her that the
King's writ often had that effect, and the symptom was
a good one.
'Now, Master Stickles, when must we start?' I asked
him, as he lounged in the yard gazing at our turkey
poults picking and running in the sun to the tune of
their father's gobble. 'Your horse was greatly
foundered, sir, and is hardly fit for the road to-day;
and Smiler was sledding yesterday all up the higher
Cleve; and none of the rest can carry me.'
'In a few more years,' replied the King's officer,
contemplating me with much satisfaction; ''twill be a
cruelty to any horse to put thee on his back, John.'
Master Stickles, by this time, was quite familiar with
us, calling me 'Jack,' and Eliza 'Lizzie,' and what I
liked the least of all, our pretty Annie 'Nancy.'
'That will be as God pleases, sir,' I answered him,
rather sharply; 'and the horse that suffers will not be
thine. But I wish to know when we must start upon our
long travel to London town. I perceive that the matter
is of great despatch and urgency.'
'To be sure, so it is, my son. But I see a yearling
turkey there, him I mean with the hop in his walk, who
(if I know aught of fowls) would roast well to-morrow.
Thy mother must have preparation: it is no more than
reasonable. Now, have that turkey killed to-night (for
his fatness makes me long for him), and we will have
him for dinner to-morrow, with, perhaps, one of his
brethren; and a few more collops of red deer's flesh
for supper, and then on the Friday morning, with the
grace of God, we will set our faces to the road, upon
His Majesty's business.'
'Nay, but good sir,' I asked with some trembling, so
eager was I to see Lorna; 'if His Majesty's business
will keep till Friday, may it not keep until Monday?
We have a litter of sucking-pigs, excellently choice
and white, six weeks old, come Friday. There be too
many for the sow, and one of them needeth roasting.
Think you not it would be a pity to leave the women to
carve it?'
'My son Jack,' replied Master Stickles, 'never was I in
such quarters yet: and God forbid that I should be so
unthankful to Him as to hurry away. And now I think on
it, Friday is not a day upon which pious people love to
commence an enterprise. I will choose the young pig
to-morrow at noon, at which time they are wont to
gambol; and we will celebrate his birthday by carving
him on Friday. After that we will gird our loins, and
set forth early on Saturday.'
Now this was little better to me than if we had set
forth at once. Sunday being the very first day upon
which it would be honourable for me to enter Glen
Doone. But though I tried every possible means with
Master Jeremy Stickles, offering him the choice for
dinner of every beast that was on the farm, he durst
not put off our departure later than the Saturday. And
nothing else but love of us and of our hospitality
would have so persuaded him to remain with us till
then. Therefore now my only chance of seeing Lorna,
before I went, lay in watching from the cliff and
espying her, or a signal from her.
This, however, I did in vain, until my eyes were weary
and often would delude themselves with hope of what
they ached for. But though I lay hidden behind the
trees upon the crest of the stony fall, and waited so
quiet that the rabbits and squirrels played around me,
and even the keen-eyed weasel took me for a trunk of
wood--it was all as one; no cast of colour changed the
white stone, whose whiteness now was hateful to me; nor
did wreath or skirt of maiden break the loneliness of
the vale.
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