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CHAPTER XXVI
JOHN IS DRAINED AND CAST ASIDE
His lordship was busy with some letters, and did not
look up for a minute or two, although he knew that I
was there. Meanwhile I stood waiting to make my bow;
afraid to begin upon him, and wondering at his great
bull-head. Then he closed his letters, well-pleased
with their import, and fixed his bold broad stare on
me, as if I were an oyster opened, and he would know
how fresh I was.
'May it please your worship,' I said, 'here I am
according to order, awaiting your good pleasure.'
'Thou art made to weight, John, more than order. How
much dost thou tip the scales to?'
'Only twelvescore pounds, my lord, when I be in
wrestling trim. And sure I must have lost weight
here, fretting so long in London.'
'Ha, ha! Much fret is there in thee! Hath His Majesty
seen thee?'
'Yes, my lord, twice or even thrice; and he made some
jest concerning me.'
'A very bad one, I doubt not. His humour is not so
dainty as mine, but apt to be coarse and unmannerly.
Now John, or Jack, by the look of thee, thou art more
used to be called.'
'Yes, your worship, when I am with old Molly and Betty
Muxworthy.'
'Peace, thou forward varlet! There is a deal too much
of thee. We shall have to try short commons with
thee, and thou art a very long common. Ha, ha! Where
is that rogue Spank? Spank must hear that by-and-by.
It is beyond thy great thick head, Jack.'
'Not so, my lord; I have been at school, and had very
bad jokes made upon me.'
'Ha, ha! It hath hit thee hard. And faith, it would be
hard to miss thee, even with harpoon. And thou lookest
like to blubber, now. Capital, in faith! I have thee
on every side, Jack, and thy sides are manifold;
many-folded at any rate. Thou shalt have double
expenses, Jack, for the wit thou hast provoked in me.'
'Heavy goods lack heavy payment, is a proverb down our
way, my lord.'
'Ah, I hurt thee, I hurt thee, Jack. The harpoon hath
no tickle for thee. Now, Jack Whale, having hauled
thee hard, we will proceed to examine thee.' Here all
his manner was changed, and he looked with his heavy
brows bent upon me, as if he had never laughed in his
life, and would allow none else to do so.
'I am ready to answer, my lord,' I replied, 'if he asks
me nought beyond my knowledge, or beyond my honour.'
'Hadst better answer me everything, lump. What hast
thou to do with honour? Now is there in thy
neighbourhood a certain nest of robbers, miscreants,
and outlaws, whom all men fear to handle?'
'Yes, my lord. At least, I believe some of them be
robbers, and all of them are outlaws.'
'And what is your high sheriff about, that he doth not
hang them all? Or send them up for me to hang, without
more to do about them?'
'I reckon that he is afraid, my lord; it is not safe to
meddle with them. They are of good birth, and
reckless; and their place is very strong.'
'Good birth! What was Lord Russell of, Lord Essex, and
this Sidney? 'Tis the surest heirship to the block to
be the chip of a good one. What is the name of this
pestilent race, and how many of them are there?'
'They are the Doones of Bagworthy forest, may it please
your worship. And we reckon there be about forty of
them, beside the women and children.'
'Forty Doones, all forty thieves! and women and
children! Thunder of God! How long have they been there
then?'
'They may have been there thirty years, my lord; and
indeed they may have been forty. Before the great war
broke out they came, longer back than I can remember.'
'Ay, long before thou wast born, John. Good, thou
speakest plainly. Woe betide a liar, whenso I get hold
of him. Ye want me on the Western Circuit; by God, and
ye shall have me, when London traitors are spun and
swung. There is a family called De Whichehalse living
very nigh thee, John?'
This he said in a sudden manner, as if to take me off
my guard, and fixed his great thick eyes on me. And in
truth I was much astonished.
'Yes, my lord, there is. At least, not so very far
from us. Baron de Whichehalse, of Ley Manor.'
'Baron, ha! of the Exchequer--eh, lad? And taketh dues
instead of His Majesty. Somewhat which halts there
ought to come a little further, I trow. It shall be
seen to, as well as the witch which makes it so to
halt. Riotous knaves in West England, drunken outlaws,
you shall dance, if ever I play pipe for you. John
Ridd, I will come to Oare parish, and rout out the Oare
of Babylon.'
'Although your worship is so learned,' I answered
seeing that now he was beginning to make things uneasy;
'your worship, though being Chief Justice, does little
justice to us. We are downright good and loyal folk;
and I have not seen, since here I came to this great
town of London, any who may better us, or even come
anigh us, in honesty, and goodness, and duty to our
neighbours. For we are very quiet folk, not prating
our own virtues--'
'Enough, good John, enough! Knowest thou not that
modesty is the maidenhood of virtue, lost even by her
own approval? Now hast thou ever heard or thought that
De Whichehalse is in league with the Doones of
Bagworthy?'
Saying these words rather slowly, he skewered his great
eyes into mine, so that I could not think at all,
neither look at him, nor yet away. The idea was so new
to me that it set my wits all wandering; and looking
into me, he saw that I was groping for the truth.
'John Ridd, thine eyes are enough for me. I see thou
hast never dreamed of it. Now hast thou ever seen a
man whose name is Thomas Faggus?'
'Yes, sir, many and many a time. He is my own worthy
cousin; and I fear he that hath intentions'--here I
stopped, having no right there to speak about our
Annie.
'Tom Faggus is a good man,' he said; and his great
square face had a smile which showed me he had met my
cousin; 'Master Faggus hath made mistakes as to the
title to property, as lawyers oftentimes may do; but
take him all for all, he is a thoroughly
straightforward man; presents his bill, and has it
paid, and makes no charge for drawing it.
Nevertheless, we must tax his costs, as of any other
solicitor.'
'To be sure, to be sure, my lord!' was all that I could
say, not understanding what all this meant.
'I fear he will come to the gallows,' said the Lord
Chief Justice, sinking his voice below the echoes;
'tell him this from me, Jack. He shall never be
condemned before me; but I cannot be everywhere, and
some of our Justices may keep short memory of his
dinners. Tell him to change his name, turn parson, or
do something else, to make it wrong to hang him.
Parson is the best thing, he hath such command of
features, and he might take his tithes on horseback.
Now a few more things, John Ridd; and for the present I
have done with thee.'
All my heart leaped up at this, to get away from London
so: and yet I could hardly trust to it.
'Is there any sound round your way of disaffection to
His Majesty, His most gracious Majesty?'
'No, my lord: no sign whatever. We pray for him in
church perhaps, and we talk about him afterwards,
hoping it may do him good, as it is intended. But
after that we have naught to say, not knowing much
about him--at least till I get home again.'
'That is as it should be, John. And the less you say
the better. But I have heard of things in Taunton,
and even nearer to you in Dulverton, and even nigher
still upon Exmoor; things which are of the pillory
kind, and even more of the gallows. I see that you
know naught of them. Nevertheless, it will not be long
before all England hears of them. Now, John, I have
taken a liking to thee, for never man told me the
truth, without fear or favour, more thoroughly and
truly than thou hast done. Keep thou clear of this, my
son. It will come to nothing; yet many shall swing
high for it. Even I could not save thee, John Ridd, if
thou wert mixed in this affair. Keep from the Doones,
keep from De Whichehalse, keep from everything which
leads beyond the sight of thy knowledge. I meant to
use thee as my tool; but I see thou art too honest and
simple. I will send a sharper down; but never let me
find thee, John, either a tool for the other side, or a
tube for my words to pass through.'
Here the Lord Justice gave me such a glare that I
wished myself well rid of him, though thankful for his
warnings; and seeing how he had made upon me a long
abiding mark of fear, he smiled again in a jocular
manner, and said,--
'Now, get thee gone, Jack. I shall remember thee; and
I trow, thou wilt'st not for many a day forget me.'
'My lord, I was never so glad to go; for the hay must
be in, and the ricks unthatched, and none of them can
make spars like me, and two men to twist every
hay-rope, and mother thinking it all right, and
listening right and left to lies, and cheated at every
pig she kills, and even the skins of the sheep to go--'
'John Ridd, I thought none could come nigh your folk in
honesty, and goodness, and duty to their neighbours!'
'Sure enough, my lord; but by our folk, I mean
ourselves, not the men nor women neither--'
'That will do, John. Go thy way. Not men, nor women
neither, are better than they need be.'
I wished to set this matter right; but his worship
would not hear me, and only drove me out of court,
saying that men were thieves and liars, no more in one
place than another, but all alike all over the world,
and women not far behind them. It was not for me to
dispute this point (though I was not yet persuaded of
it), both because my lord was a Judge, and must know
more about it, and also that being a man myself I might
seem to be defending myself in an unbecoming manner.
Therefore I made a low bow, and went; in doubt as to
which had the right of it.
But though he had so far dismissed me, I was not yet
quite free to go, inasmuch as I had not money enough to
take me all the way to Oare, unless indeed I should go
afoot, and beg my sustenance by the way, which seemed
to be below me. Therefore I got my few clothes packed,
and my few debts paid, all ready to start in half an
hour, if only they would give me enough to set out upon
the road with. For I doubted not, being young and
strong, that I could walk from London to Oare in ten
days or in twelve at most, which was not much longer
than horse-work; only I had been a fool, as you will
say when you hear it. For after receiving from Master
Spank the amount of the bill which I had
delivered--less indeed by fifty shillings than the
money my mother had given me, for I had spent fifty
shillings, and more, in seeing the town and treating
people, which I could not charge to His Majesty--I had
first paid all my debts thereout, which were not very
many, and then supposing myself to be an established
creditor of the Treasury for my coming needs, and
already scenting the country air, and foreseeing the
joy of my mother, what had I done but spent half my
balance, ay and more than three-quarters of it, upon
presents for mother, and Annie, and Lizzie, John Fry,
and his wife, and Betty Muxworthy, Bill Dadds, Jim
Slocombe, and, in a word, half of the rest of the
people at Oare, including all the Snowe family, who
must have things good and handsome? And if I must
while I am about it, hide nothing from those who read
me, I had actually bought for Lorna a thing the price
of which quite frightened me, till the shopkeeper said
it was nothing at all, and that no young man, with a
lady to love him, could dare to offer her rubbish, such
as the Jew sold across the way. Now the mere idea of
beautiful Lorna ever loving me, which he talked about
as patly (though of course I never mentioned her) as if
it were a settled thing, and he knew all about it, that
mere idea so drove me abroad, that if he had asked
three times as much, I could never have counted the
money.
Now in all this I was a fool of course--not for
remembering my friends and neighbours, which a man has
a right to do, and indeed is bound to do, when he comes
from London--but for not being certified first what
cash I had to go on with. And to my great amazement,
when I went with another bill for the victuals of only
three days more, and a week's expense on the homeward
road reckoned very narrowly, Master Spank not only
refused to grant me any interview, but sent me out a
piece of blue paper, looking like a butcher's ticket,
and bearing these words and no more, 'John Ridd, go to
the devil. He who will not when he may, when he will,
he shall have nay.' From this I concluded that I had
lost favour in the sight of Chief Justice Jeffreys.
Perhaps because my evidence had not proved of any
value! perhaps because he meant to let the matter lie,
till cast on him.
Anyhow, it was a reason of much grief, and some anger
to me, and very great anxiety, disappointment, and
suspense. For here was the time of the hay gone past,
and the harvest of small corn coming on, and the trout
now rising at the yellow Sally, and the blackbirds
eating our white-heart cherries (I was sure, though I
could not see them), and who was to do any good for
mother, or stop her from weeping continually? And more
than this, what was become of Lorna? Perhaps she had
cast me away altogether, as a flouter and a changeling;
perhaps she had drowned herself in the black well;
perhaps (and that was worst of all) she was even
married, child as she was, to that vile Carver Doone,
if the Doones ever cared about marrying! That last
thought sent me down at once to watch for Mr. Spank
again, resolved that if I could catch him, spank him I
would to a pretty good tune, although sixteen in
family.
However, there was no such thing as to find him; and
the usher vowed (having orders I doubt) that he was
gone to the sea for the good of his health, having
sadly overworked himself; and that none but a poor
devil like himself, who never had handling of money,
would stay in London this foul, hot weather; which was
likely to bring the plague with it. Here was another
new terror for me, who had heard of the plagues of
London, and the horrible things that happened; and so
going back to my lodgings at once, I opened my clothes
and sought for spots, especially as being so long at a
hairy fellmonger's; but finding none, I fell down and
thanked God for that same, and vowed to start for Oare
to-morrow, with my carbine loaded, come weal come woe,
come sun come shower; though all the parish should
laugh at me, for begging my way home again, after the
brave things said of my going, as if I had been the
King's cousin.
But I was saved in some degree from this lowering of my
pride, and what mattered more, of mother's; for going
to buy with my last crown-piece (after all demands were
paid) a little shot and powder, more needful on the
road almost than even shoes or victuals, at the corner
of the street I met my good friend Jeremy Stickles,
newly come in search of me. I took him back to my
little room--mine at least till to-morrow morning--and
told him all my story, and how much I felt aggrieved by
it. But he surprised me very much, by showing no
surprise at all.
'It is the way of the world, Jack. They have gotten
all they can from thee, and why should they feed thee
further? We feed not a dead pig, I trow, but baste him
well with brine and rue. Nay, we do not victual him
upon the day of killing; which they have done to thee.
Thou art a lucky man, John; thou hast gotten one day's
wages, or at any rate half a day, after thy work was
rendered. God have mercy on me, John! The things I
see are manifold; and so is my regard of them. What
use to insist on this, or make a special point of that,
or hold by something said of old, when a different mood
was on? I tell thee, Jack, all men are liars; and he
is the least one who presses not too hard on them for
lying.'
This was all quite dark to me, for I never looked at
things like that, and never would own myself a liar,
not at least to other people, nor even to myself,
although I might to God sometimes, when trouble was
upon me. And if it comes to that, no man has any right
to be called a 'liar' for smoothing over things
unwitting, through duty to his neighbour.
'Five pounds thou shalt have, Jack,' said Jeremy
Stickles suddenly, while I was all abroad with myself
as to being a liar or not; 'five pounds, and I will
take my chance of wringing it from that great rogue
Spank. Ten I would have made it, John, but for bad
luck lately. Put back your bits of paper, lad; I will
have no acknowledgment. John Ridd, no nonsense with
me!'
For I was ready to kiss his hand, to think that any man
in London (the meanest and most suspicious place, upon
all God's earth) should trust me with five pounds,
without even a receipt for it! It overcame me so that
I sobbed; for, after all, though big in body, I am but
a child at heart. It was not the five pounds that
moved me, but the way of giving it; and after so much
bitter talk, the great trust in my goodness.
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